I’ve only been practicing yoga for two years now, this past April. I may have had countless hours on my mat, own a Shiva Nataraja murti, and listen to “yoga music” on the regular, but I still consider myself a newbie when it comes to yoga. Just when i think I know a pose thoroughly, my teachers always have a way of making me feel it like I never have before. There are always revisions or tweaks to everything.
It’s a very humbling experience when you think you know something, but then quickly realize that you know nothing all.
I am a very good student. I follow instructions very well, I am very dedicated. I’m always wanting to know more. If anyone were to watch me in class, I would probably be staring at my teacher in awe and admiration. Much like a five year old would gawk at an animated Pixar film.
Many people of my friends have asked me, “Why don’t you just become a yoga instructor?” Karen, my teacher in Las Vegas, was even making me keep track of my studio hours just in case I decide to teach one day. As flattering as it is for people to think of my practice in that way…nothing sounds more disgusting to me.
There’s something to be said to just being a student. As a student, I get the full benefits of yoga. Every day I am able to walk into class and be inspired, get plenty of exercise, have an amazing savasana, and leave completely blissed out. I think to myself, “All of this was for me.” Why would I want to change that?
As a teacher, my experience with my practice and yoga would change completely. It would force me think about things like:
1. Do I have enough students in the class so I can make “X” amount of money?
2. Would I be financially stable as a Yoga teacher?
3. I’m limited in what I can do in class because there are so many new people.
4. When can I make time for my own practice?
5. I would feel responsible for people if they got injured in class.
6. I’d have to hear about teachers sleeping with their students or other colleagues.
I’m not interested in ANY of it.
Some teachers can do this effortlessly, but I know it takes a lot of work. I am grateful for the teachers who can accomplish this. Without them, I wouldn’t be in class. You have to have that “something” in order to teach yoga. Well, I have come across teachers who don’t have this “thing” about them. But, you won’t see me in any of their classes.
There is so much more to yoga than just downward dog and warrior two poses. After two years, I feel like I’m just beginning to scratch the surface of what yoga really is all about. How could I try to teach others something that I don’t even completely understand? It doesn’t seem right. I don’t feel comfortable teaching someone handstands when I can’t even stay up in the middle of the room more than ten seconds.
I go to class three or four days a week to be inspired, to grow emotionally and physically. And, I want that feeling every time I’m in the studio. Being a teacher, I feel, would take all away from me. I wouldn’t be fun anymore.
Having fun is one thing that I’m interested in doing.
I’m so thankful that I have teachers who inspire me everyday.
I’m a damn good student. But, me, a yoga teacher?